DEAR...

 in our life we meet and greet a lot of people in a lot of different places , phases and circumstances. some of them become friends and some we just pass by and some of them get their place in our heart , mind and soul. we feel them without them telling us anything , we think about them , we are happy when they are around and we feel every problem is smaller if they are facing it with us. we can do anything halal for them at any cost.

in my life i love very few people , not even more than 8 or 9 . that includes my parents , my aunt and uncle . my two freinds and YOU MY DEAR.

when i joined this work , i was not interested in love or marriage or any kind of attraction. my plan was to  not go for any relationship or behind anyone and let ur heart tell u when u r ready and whom he wants to be with . everything was normal , no feelings for anyone, no fear of losing them ,just me , my work and a bored routine and that continued TILL I SAW U FOR THE FIRST TIME.... to be honest at first i did'nt feel anything and we did not even talk till after some months.. we started talking and than we started joking sometimes , but i was very curious to know more about u , like where did u come from , what languages do you speak , are u single or not and all of that. u was MYSTYRIOUS person to me , but i was too introvert to ask anything...the chain continued and unknowingly my interest in you also kept increasing day after day , talk after talk .

my attraction started for u , and the reason was u was so different from others. the way u talk , the way u listen , the way u joke or smile or laugh or even do the smallest things , the way u look , the way u walk everything about u started fascinating me. i started trying to find anyway to divert ur attention to me , to get u talking to me as much as i could. sometimes i will ask some stupid questions just to talk to u. i was really trying hard to have ur attention , but at the same time i did not want you to understand what i was trying to do , so i was very careful and sometimes i pissed u off too. this continued till u said I BROKE UP WITH MY FIANCE AND NOW I AM SINGLE .. that was the turning point for me . that was the day i decided i have to be with this girl , i have to try and convince her to marry me.

so i started flirting with u on and off and everytime i do , u use to just get me off of that and tell me DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT. i was hopeful but my hope was really low , i wanted to talk but was too scared to ask for your number . i kept telling myself "i will take her number when the time is right" but it was taking too long and i had the fear of someone else coming and taking ur heart away while i just sit there and keep waiting for the right time. than an unfortunate incident happened in ur life and u left the city for the funeral. i felt really bad that day and shed some tears too. than i took ur number from someone and after a lot of fight within me i texted u with my full introduction and condolence. u called me and we talked for the first time outside the hospital.

there were some good deep conversations between us . u kept telling me that u want to quit the job and i was trying to convince u to stay. the idea of u leaving the hospital without knowing my feelings  was disturbing me and i was trying really hard to make u stay.

there was a point when i realized , there is no point of being shy and hiding ur feelings , if u dont confess someone else will come an do it and u will keep just looking at her go away. so i decide to go ALL IN no matter what happens just tell her what u feel about her and let the destiny decide what happens next.

u tried everything to put off , and to be honest i thought u succeeded at some point of time.. the words were harsh and i was feeling hopeless and was about to give up TILL YOUR BIRTHDAY NIGHT.. u asked me to wish you and i felt really good because that was the first time u shared something about u with me without me asking about it. i wished u and our contineous every night chat started from there..

u was clear that u are not going to marry or date someone who works with u , and i was clear that am gonna change her mind and marry her. those ramadan talks , games we played , we become really close and u also shared it with your mom , and my hope went from 10 to 100 in that mubarak month... but i was still in fear of u not being the same when u come back and start working , u know sometimes people talk to just keep some company and than stop when they have something else to do i was fearing that.. but told myself let us see what happens once she is back and to my good luck WE DID NOT STOP  which meant that u was interested in me too ( a little bit).

i kept confessing and u kept telling me why we should not date. we had arguments , fights , block nad some kind of negativity between us.. TILL ALL THOSE THINGS FADE AWAY AND WE BOTH FALL IN LOVE WITH EACHOTHER WHOLE HEARTDLY AND DECIDED THAT WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER...

RUFI.. my love for u is not just about ur sexy butt , beautiful lips , soft skin , small hands , affectionate smile , quite and ellegant walk , big attractive eyes , small nose , nice smell , good sense of humour , 36 waist , big small legs , thighs that can make anyone go mad . ur soft voice , ur soft like leaf body , face like 14th night , walk like a peacock , or u being a package of sexy body packed in an innocent smile and handled by a powerful mind... i love all that and keep having visions of u and me naked on the same bed , doing a lot of thing on each other all the time.. but my love is not just ur body and figure.

it is also about ur thoughts , ur way of handling things , ur love for ur self , for independency . i like the way u look at the world , the way u listen and try to understand , the way u try and convince someone why u dont agree with them.. sometimes the way u tell things is harsh but it is also the truth...

i love u from the bottom of my heart and i know it will take time for u to have the same feelings for me but i can wait. the fear of losing u is always in my mind , the idea of u and me no being together scares me a lot. i know i cant change the destiny , but i have asked U FROM GOD more times than i could count , before and after we confessed..i hope u read this and understand my feeling better than before . 

i want us to be under the same roof , laying on the same bed , eating from the same plate. want to see u wearing my shirts when we are inside .. want to wake up seeing ur face everyday , kissing u good morning and good night . i want to treat u like a baby.. too feed u , dress u, undress u , give a bath to u , take a bath from u , give u massage , tease u , touch u , listen to u , share with u my problems and ask for solutions....

DARLING I WANNA HAVE MY BEST LIFE WITH YOU.. A LIFE FILLED WITH UNDERSTANDINGS , LOVE AND RESPECT...I REALLY LOVE U AND MORE THAN THAT I RESPECT YOU AND YOUR DECISIIONS..AM NOT SAYING LIFE WILL BE ONLY ROSSES , BUT AM SURE IF WE HAVE THE SAME FEELING FOR EACHOTHER WE CAN TURN EVERY HARDSHIP TO FLOWER AND EVRY PROBLEM INTO A SOLUTION....

I LOVE YOU...